Life has never been easy
But I managed to pull through
And it’s so justifying to know I did it without you
I grew up thinking I wouldn’t need you
Ever
But there’s a dark void where your love should be
And it will only ever grow deeper
And no matter where I go
I will constantly be reminded that you will never care
Because I’ve never tasted that bittersweet affection that every child should
Having it now would be pointless
But
As you can see
Life goes on
And I admit
There are nights when I cry
Sometimes uncontrollably
But that’s ok
And this emptiness will continue to eat at my soul
But I’ll pull through
Better yet
Without you
I do possess some traits, however, that my mother does not show
And so my reflection is unclear
But it’s always been that way
Looking back it doesn’t seem so bad
And I may have been that little girl
Alone
In the cold night air
Drowning in a sea of booze and pub brawls
But God made me strong
And I would’ve done anything to hear you say
“It’s ok. I’m here.”
But no matter how much I pray
Or how hard I cry
It’ll never change the fact that when you walked out that door
You walked out of my life completely
Maybe it has always been hard
Maybe I’ve just been too proud to notice
Pride aside, Dad
I miss you
And even love you