I Found a Boy

Ribbons of sunlight dance across your face as you laugh melodically…maniacally.
I’m frozen.
Trapped in time as the walls around me begin to melt like ice cubes in the summer heat. I hear them dripping around me as I lay there staring, reverent, into your iridescent abyss; watching casually as you hold back all the things you long to say.

I watch your silent, internal battle, as the words creep to your lips and your struggle to keep them sealed. I marvel in shameless curiousity at the words you will not speak as a wave of maddening nervousness ripples through my stomach and turns my fingertips into an emergency exit for caged butterflies in a rage.

In that single moment, I am altogether terrified of the things I dare not feel, for you are a lighthouse on a lonely cliff; my soul a lost ship searching for home.

Many years have passed since the stones in the pit of my stomach have trembled the way they do when I’m with you. I know not what to do with all of this…”ness”.

Questions burn at the back of my throat like hot lead in pursuit of an adequate mould.

Who was I before our paths crossed?
Where have I been in the days of your sweet adventures across this lonely planet?

You shake the very core of my being without so much as a word and I have never felt more terrified in all my life.

I cannot give in to such madness.
I will not yield to your splendour.

For if this early intervention makes me question my past, who will I be in the future?

Who will you be?

And why, when I wake each icy morning, is it your smile I long to feel on the nape of my neck?

Who are you?

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